Movie Review: Colombiana (2011)

Posted: April 15, 2012 in Drama
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As a child, Cateleya Restreppo  (Amandla Stenberg, Zoe Saldana) sees her drug dealing parents gunned down by a rival drug dealer, named Don Luis, (Beto Benites) Before he dies, Cataleya’s father gives her a disk full of drug dealers names, which she takes to the American embassy in Colombia, this gets Catalaya a ticket to Chicago Illinois, where she lives with her uncle, Emilio (Cliff Curtis) and Emilio’s mother, Mama  (Offelia Medina) Cateleya sets out to get revenge on Don Luis, and starts killing 22 of Don Luis’ henchmen.  After she breaks into a prison and kills victim 22, FBI agent Ross (Lennie James) gets involved.  Along the way Cataleya  gets herself an artist boyfriend named Danny. (Michael Vartan) Does Cataleya kill Don Luis?  Or does Ross get to her first?

This is an awful movie.  Zoe Saldana should be ashamed of herself for perpetuating such graphically violent negative stereotypes of blacks and Latinas.  Everybody from Columbia are drug dealers and murderers aren’t they?  No they are not, and Saldana who is proud of both of both her black and Latina backgrounds should know better than to play the daughter of a Latino drug dealer, who turns into an assassin. Forget the broadly negative stereotypes, the plot is so full of holes , it makes Swiss Cheese look solid by comparison.  For example, Cateleya’s uncle shows her the perils of being a killer by shooting someone on the street, in broad daylight, and just walks away. Huh?  And this movie is clearly marketed to minorities, nobody even starts to investigate these murders until agent Ross shows up and he’s black.  There’s nothing inherently wrong with marketing a movie to minorities, Shaft, and Superfly are two good “blackspoitation” movies as are Coffy  and Foxy Brown.  This is a bad movie cynically marketed to blacks and Latinos, and minorities should be most offended that such a bad movie is aimed at them. The acting is subpar, I thought Saldana was a better actress than that, but her acting in this movie consists of taking off her clothes and hopping into bed, repeatedly. Amandla Stenberg is better in “The Hunger Games.”  She lays her accent on a little too thick. The rest of the actors are mannequins, just going through the motions.

Columbiana:  Awful in any language.

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