Posts Tagged ‘liam neeson’

a million ways to die in the west

Albert Stark (Seth McFarlane) is a cowardly sheep farmer from Old Stump Arizona in 1862. His girlfriend Louise (Amanda Seyfried) sees no future in dating a sheep farmer, and so she breaks up with Albert, and starts dating Foy, (Neil Patrick Harris) owner of a mustache accessory store.  A new girl named Anna (Charlize Theron) comes to town, and falls in love with Albert.  Unbeknownst to Albert, Anna is the wife of the most feared gunman in the territory, Clinch Leatherwood. (Liam Neeson) What happens when Clinch comes to Old Stump?  Does Albert find out that Anna is Clinch’s wife?  Does Clinch find out that Anna has fallen in love with Anna?

The running gag in this movie is that the residents in this town keep dying in unusual ways.  To call the humor in this movie juvenile is an insult to juveniles everywhere.  The movie that this movie most closely compares to is of course Blazing Saddles, but the two aren’t even in the same ballpark.  Sure there is the one scene in Blazing Saddles with the cowboys eating baked beans, but every scene in A Million Ways To Die in The West is the baked beans scene, and that gets old fast.  Blazing Saddles is a much more daring and better movie, the idea of a black sheriff in the Old West is much more controversial and frankly funnier than anything McFarlane can come up with.  I don’t like Family Guy, McFarlane’s tv show, it’s an unfunny version of the Simpsons, so I already went into this movie with low expectations, but this movie didn’t even meet those low expectations.  There’s the requisite drug humor because McFarlane is “cool”, unnecessary special effects, an unbelievably unrealistic love story, and Gilbert Gottfied as Abe Lincoln.  If you’re still planning to watch this on cable, unsubscribe to the cable channel that’s airing it, if your friend gives this to you as a present, unfriend him/her right away. You can do better.  If your mom gives this to you as a present, have her take a maternity test, no mom would make her son or daughter watch this movie. Get as far away from this movie as humanly possible.  Please.

Seth McFarlane plays kind of an odd character, he seems to be a 2014 guy in 1860’s Arizona, and so they whole movie has an air of phoniness to it.  There are so many anachronisms in this movie, I lost count.  What the heck is Charlize Theron doing in this movie?  Ruining her career apparently.  She is literally paid to laugh at all of McFarlane’s stupid jokes.  Amanda Seyfried is also taking match and gasoline to her once-promising career.  Sarah Silverman is taking her “shock jock” persona from her stand-up routine to this movie, and it doesn’t translate well. Neil Patrick Harris is simply not funny as the smug entrepreneur.  And it’s official, Liam Neeson is in every Hollywood movie currently being made, his Irish accent and character was much better in The Lego movie.

This movie is too long by at least a half hour, who let McFarlane turn this movie into a 2 hour snoozefest?  Surprise, surprise,  the director is Seth McFarlane, proving he knows nothing about directing a movie.  Pacing, look it up Seth, your movie has none. So this movie limps to an end after 2 hours of a meandering pointless story.

A Million Ways To Die in The West.  Shear-ly awful.

nonstop

A United States Air Marshall named Bill Marks (Liam Neeson)  is on  a flight to London, when he receives a text saying in twenty minutes someone will die on this flight, unless 150 million dollars is sent to a secret account . Marks quickly deduces that the perpetrator of the text is coming from Jack Hammond, (Anson Mount) another Air Marshall.  After a violent struggle, Marks kills Hammond, but the texts keep coming.   Twenty minutes after the new texts, the pilot dies, it may be a heart attack, it may be poison.  Another man in Marks’ custody dies, and the secret account is traced to Marks.  The government officials on the ground are starting to suspect Marks, but there are other suspects, a pretty redhead named Jen Summers (Julianne Moore) who switched seats to sit next to Marks, and was in close proximity when the pilot died, a stewardess named Nancy (Michelle Dockery) who was the only one who had a key to the cockpit, an Arab passenger named Fahim Nasir (Omar Metwally) or was it someone else on the plane?

Non-Stop succeeds at being a suspenseful film, even if it’s sometimes redundant.  Every few minutes a new suspect emerges, and undergoes a grilling from Marks.  For 90 minutes, the suspense keeps escalating, but then the who and why are revealed and the suspense leaks out of this movie like air from a balloon.  The movie then proceeds to its predictable ending.

What makes this movie work is a superb performance by Liam  Neeson, in an otherwise unremarkable role.  He gives this Air Marshall an air of vulnerability and humanity that makes the character more complex and therefore more appealing.  There are a few scenes where Neeson really connected with me emotionally, one a soliloquy and a couple of scenes with a child actress.  Neeson is an excellent character actor, he classed up The Phantom Menace, and was excellent in two of the three Batman sequels.   And who can forget his funny turn as Bad Cop in The Lego Movie. I wasn’t sold on this new iteration of Neeson as action star, I didn’t like Taken at all, but he won me over in this role.  Julianne Moore is effective, albeit less so, as the quirky suspicious passenger net to Neeson.  Corey Stoll is also good as another passenger on the plane, but Lupita Nyongo, the heart and soul of 12 Years A Slave, was completely wasted in this film.

The movie is long, and even though the action scenes are well-choreographed and fast paced, there are scenes that lag, the movie could have used some editing. The director is Jaume Collett Serra,  who directed Orphan which I didn’t like, and Unknown another Neeson film.

Non-Stop Marshall Law in the air.

the lego movie

President Business (Will Ferrell) steals the Kragle, an object of unlimited power, from Vitruvius (Morgan Freeman) a prophet who predicts that someone called the Special , will find another object called the Piece of Resistance, that has the ability to stop the all-powerful Kragle from inflicting any harm. An average construction worker named Emmitt Brickowski  (Chris Pratt) is so good at fitting in, and following all the rules, that he doesn’t leave an impression on anyone.

Emmitt is happy listening to his favorite song, “Everything Is Awesome” and watching his favorite show, “Where Are My Pants” both produced by the Octan corporation, whose CEO is President Business.   He follows the blueprints to build everything, and is perfectly content to go on living the way he lives. Emmitt is at the construction site after hours, telling someone to leave because it’s against the rules.  All of a sudden, he realizes that the intruder is the most beautiful girl he’s ever seen.  Her name is Wildstyle (Elizabeth Banks) and she’s after the Piece of Resistance.  While Emmitt is transfixed by Wildstyle the Piece of Resistance becomes permanently affixed to Emmitt, and he can’t take it off.  Now that Emmitt has the Piece of Resistance he becomes a target of President Business and his loyal foot soldier Bad Cop (Liam Neeson) President Business is planning to use the Kragle to immobilize the citizens of his realm on Taco Tuesday, because he is a rigid dictator.  Can Emmitt evade Bad Cop and get the Piece of Resistance to the top of the Octan Tower before President Business uses the Kragle on his populace?  Is Emmitt the Special?  Does he fulfill the prophesy?

This is a wonderful movie.  The Everyman has a chance to rise to the occasion, and become the Special.  That might be a hackneyed premise, it may even be borrowed from movies like Star Wars and The Matrix, but that’s what makes this movie so endearing, it doesn’t take itself too seriously at all.  It’s even subtly subversive, ok obviously subversive, anti-corporate and wackily anti-conformist.  The Lego Movie does lose its focus a bit when it becomes solely about product placement when Emmitt zooms around the different playsets, but unlike Transformers (Similar toy, worse movies) The Lego Movie finds its footing, and has a satisfying ending, which is neither cloying nor saccharine, but heartfelt. More important than all the adult themes kids learn the importance of individuality, and also working together when necessary.  Those themes may seem contradictory, but they are not in this movie.

The voice talent is amazing in this movie.  Chris Pratt plays Emmitt as a low key hero.  Morgan Freeman is splendid, just hearing his golden voice as the prophet Vitruvius is worth the price of a rental.  Will Ferrell redeems himself after a string of lousy movies, as the evil President Business, but there’s more to his character than initially appears.  Elizabeth Banks has a great voice, she conveys a sense of innocence, and yet her voice sounds sexy.  Can I say she has a sexy voice in a movie aimed at kids?  Well it’s true.  Will Arnett is hilarious as Batman, and Liam Neeson makes a nice comedic turn as Bad Cop.  There are cameos by a few Star Wars stars, Anthony Daniels and Billy Dee Williams add to the laughs, and professional voice actor Keith Ferguson does a pretty serviceable Harrison Ford impression as Han Solo. Shaquille O’ Neal even shows up as himself.  All the actors understood how much fun this movie was, and joined in the spirit of making a truly entertaining film.

The pacing of this movie is more like an action film than an animated film, so the 1 hour 40 minute length goes by in a flash, rent it and watch it with your kids, or watch it with your friends, it’s that funny.

The Lego Movie:  All the pieces fit to make a very good film.

Catherine Stewart (Julianne Moore) is a wealthy and successful gynecologist.  Her husband David (Liam Neeson) is a beloved music professor.  They seem to be living an idyllic life.  But then, David misses a surprise birthday party thrown by Catherine, and Catherine sees a text from one of David’s female students, thanking him for a great night.  Catherine suspects David of infidelity, and sets out to entrap him with a female escort from nearby, named Chloe (Amanda Seyfried) Chloe tells Catherine of her and David’s first encounter, and each salacious detail of every subsequent meeting.  Catherine seems oddly drawn to Chloe, even while professing her love for David,  But then Chloe forms a bond with Michael, (Max Thieriot), but who is she really interested in, David? Michael?  Catherine?

Don’t bother to find out.  This movie is so predictable, the viewer knows immediately what’s going on.  Despite having a great cast, featuring the likes of Liam Neeson, Julianne Moore, and Amanda Seyfried, this movie is basically a horrible mix of Basic Instinct and Fatal Attraction, and that’s all you need to know.  Hollywood always seems to populate these movies with these psychologically deranged women, Sharon Stone, Glenn Close, and I’ll let the viewers find out who the nutjob du jour is in this movie.  Despite having a hot indie director at the helm, and a hot young actress staring wide-eyed into the camera (no not Julianne Moore), this movie ends up with the same tired clichés that most of Hollywood manages to conjure up every now and again.  Moore looks bored, Neeson looks like a wax dummy at Madame Toussaud’s.   Seyfried does her best vacant stare, to no effect.  They all deserve the horror of being locked in a room to watch this movie.  If you like cheap titillation, dressed up as arthouse cinema, this is your movie .  If you like to think, think again, before watching this movie. Chloe has lots of nudity, one graphic sex scene.  It is too explicit for children, too predictable for adults.  Just skip it.

Chloe.  Cloying.

 

Bryan (Neeson) is a retired CIA agent.  He’s divorced from his wife, Lenore (Jannsen) who remarried an older, richer man.  Brian dotes on his daughter Kim, (Maggie Grace) he buys her a karaoke machine for her birthday, but stepdaddy got Kim a pony, and mom clearly agrees with spoiling Kim rotten.  Now Kim wants to go to Europe to follow U2 on tour, even though she’s only 17.  Kim needs a signed waiver from Brian to let her go, Brian doesn’t like the idea of letting Kim go to Europe with an 18 year old girlfriend, but he relents, under heavy pressure from Lenore, under the vondition that Kim keep in close contact with her dad, via cellphone.  No sooner is Kim in Paris, then she gets kidnapped by a group of Albanians involved in the human flesh trade.  Daddy Brian hops into action and the chase is on, does Bryan rescue Kim?

Don’t bother to find out.  This is a very predictable action film, and Liam Neeson is not exactly the best action star around either.  He looks old and tired most of the time, like Harrison Ford in Firewall.  This is very standard issue hero stuff, bullets fly but Liam never gets a scratch. he just looks like he wants to nap.  And he affects some sort of fake American accent that’s distracting.  I enjoyed watching him beat up on Frenchies though, as they are very annoying.  Famke Jannsen plays a witch on wheels, she gives poor Liam a hard time from the minute they see each other in this movie.  I wish she was the one who was kidnapped.  Maggie Grace just plays stupid clueless victim the whole time, no surprises from her character.  No surprises from any character.

 

Taken.  Don’t get taken.

It’s eight years after D.A. Harvey Dent has died.  Dent is lauded as a hero, and many criminals have been locked away as a result of the Dent Law, which gives police more expansive powers when arresting criminals.  Everything seems tranquil, Batman (Christian Bale) has retired and is viewed as a villain to most of Gotham.  Bruce Wayne has become somewhat of a recluse, dealing with physical pain and mental exhaustion.  Newer, younger cops like Detective Blake (Joseph Gordon Leavitt) and Foley (Matthew Modine) are ready to stop crime in the name of Harvey Dent, and Commissioner Gordon (Gary Oldman) is being put out to pasture.  Despite the seeming tranquility, several situations are lurking just below the surface.  A maid in Wayne Manor is really a cat burgler, named Selina Kyle aka Catwoman (Anne Hathaway) and is trying to steal Bruce Wayne’s mother’s favorite pearls out from under his nose.  If that isn’t bad enough, Selina kidnaps a Senator. While on the trail of the missing Senator, Commissioner Gordon follows two street criminals into the sewer, and finds a city beneath the city, being run by criminal mastermind named Bane. (Tom Hardy)
 Bane is planning nothing short of a revolution in Gotham City, he says he wants to give power back to the people.  As he emerges from the sewer, Bane’s first act is to short Wayne Enterprises stock, making it essentially worthless, and shoot several stockbrokers in the process.  Bruce hears from Alfred (Michael Caine) that Bane was trained by Ra’s Al Ghul (Liam Neeson) but then excommunicated from the League of Shadows.  All of this is enough for Bruce Wayne to want to don the Batsuit again, but first he has to prevent an energy source, that Wayne Enterprises helped develop for peaceful purposes, from falling into Bane’s hands.
 First Bruce turns over power of Wayne Enterprises to Miranda (Marion Cotillard) the scientist working on the peaceful energy source, and then Batman seeks to find Bane, but he needs Catwoman’s help to find Bane.  Batman’s first encounter with Bane does not go well, and he ends up in Gotham City jail, with a wall that has only been scaled by one person, according to rumor, and that is Bane.  Does Bruce get out of prison?  Does he take on Bane again? Does Bane learn to convert the peaceful energy source into a nuclear weapon?
 Despite all the hype, this movie is truly a worthy sequel to the Dark Knight. For the first hour and a half I did not think so and was ready to pan it, and ready to come up with snappy one liners about Bane, calling him Mr. Clean in a gas mask. I was also wondering tongue firmly in cheek, whether it was a sequel to Inception with all the stars from Inception in this movie.  Cotillard, Leavitt, Hardy, I was expecting Leo Dicaprio to hop out of the woodwork any time.  But then, a strange thing happened in the last hour of the movie. The story came together, Bane became more than a fat arch villain, he began to exploit the verbiage of the 99 percent for his own craven goals, and that turned this movie for me.  Then there was a huge plot twist toward the end of the movie which turned the movie into an absolute treat to watch. There is also and Inception type twist near the end, that I will not divulge that is also fun to speculate about.  That’s what makes Nolan’s films so much fun, there’s always more to them then meets the eye.  It was also fun to see Neeson again as Ra’s Al Ghul as well as Cillian Murphy as Sandman in this sequel. As good as this movie was, it requires the viewer to have a working knowledge of the first two movies, as such this is a sequel that doesn’t work as a movie on its own, usually that matters, not this time.
The acting as expected was top notch.  Bale owns Batman, he plays it better than anyone I’ve seen, no one should play this role for a long time unless it’s Bale, he’s perfected the duality of Batman/Bruce Wayne. Tom Hardy won me over as Bane, at first, I thought he was just a bellowing blowhard, but the details of his character and the way Hardy played it was superb.  Anne Hathaway also won me over, I really didn’t that she could pull off a complex, sophisticated performance, but she did, although I still think that she’s too young for the role.  My favorite performance belongs to Cotillard who has to give a complex and multilayered performance, and boy does she deliver.  Cotillard is a fantastic actress, and it’s getting to the point where I’d pay to hear her read the phone book.  Joseph Gordon Leavitt is one of the best young actors in the moies today, and he does not disappoint here. This is by far the best movie of the year.  See it.
 My first viewing of this movie came on July 21st, in  the wake of the senseless killing of 12 people in Colorado, who wanted nothing more than to escape the problems of society by watching a movie.  Little did they know they’d soon confront a grave problem facing our society, a madman with a gun.  I send my deepest condolences to the families who lost members of their family in the shooting spree.  While it was surreal seeing a movie with police standing guard outside the theater, movies are a way of life for me, and I will never give that up, no matter the circumstance.  I subsequently saw the movie two weeks later, and enjoyed it just as much, still saddened by the tragedy that happened two weeks before in my favorite venue, a movie theater.
The Dark Knight Rises.  Rise out of your chair, go to a theater and see it for yourself.